Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Juno
Alien has discovered a real sleeper of a comedy that will surprise you with its wit and charm. This sensitive and intelligent film deals with an unwanted teenage pregnancy and the reactions of the people involved. Ellen Page is perfect as Juno, the smart-mouthed, sarcastic, wise-beyond-her-years mother-to-be who marches to the beat of a different drummer. She will make you laugh and she will break your heart. Surrounding her is a great supporting cast which includes Michael Cera, J.K. Simmons, Allison Janney, Jason Bateman, and Jennifer Garner. They all give remarkable performances in this delightful story about the complexities of pregnancy, motherhood, parenthood, and love. The wonderful dialogue is quick and funny.
Alien gives it 3 “skank eyes and blue slurpy” stars out of 4.
Alien has discovered a real sleeper of a comedy that will surprise you with its wit and charm. This sensitive and intelligent film deals with an unwanted teenage pregnancy and the reactions of the people involved. Ellen Page is perfect as Juno, the smart-mouthed, sarcastic, wise-beyond-her-years mother-to-be who marches to the beat of a different drummer. She will make you laugh and she will break your heart. Surrounding her is a great supporting cast which includes Michael Cera, J.K. Simmons, Allison Janney, Jason Bateman, and Jennifer Garner. They all give remarkable performances in this delightful story about the complexities of pregnancy, motherhood, parenthood, and love. The wonderful dialogue is quick and funny.
Alien gives it 3 “skank eyes and blue slurpy” stars out of 4.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Hitman
It’s “Dark Angel” meets Jason Bourne meets the “Transporter” meets “From Russia with Love” in this hired assassin story based on a video game character. Timothy Olyphant is the bald-headed, bar-coded, mysterious mercenary (Agent 47) who must figure out who’s trying to kill him while dragging a sexy Russian whore around with him. The hero plays it so cool that he emanates the personality of an ice cube. This film has a Euro trash feel with a mediocre script driving it. Except for some flashes of shoot ‘em up, cut ‘em up, blow ‘em up, this film is kind of boring and senseless. It is probably just like the video game! Alien just can’t figure out why it is so hard for the pursuers to spot a guy with a big bar code tattooed to his bald head. Who is the mastermind who decided to mark his team of assassins in such an obviously telling way? He might as well put a big "L" on their foreheads.
Alien gives it 1 ½ “gamers delight” stars out of 4.
It’s “Dark Angel” meets Jason Bourne meets the “Transporter” meets “From Russia with Love” in this hired assassin story based on a video game character. Timothy Olyphant is the bald-headed, bar-coded, mysterious mercenary (Agent 47) who must figure out who’s trying to kill him while dragging a sexy Russian whore around with him. The hero plays it so cool that he emanates the personality of an ice cube. This film has a Euro trash feel with a mediocre script driving it. Except for some flashes of shoot ‘em up, cut ‘em up, blow ‘em up, this film is kind of boring and senseless. It is probably just like the video game! Alien just can’t figure out why it is so hard for the pursuers to spot a guy with a big bar code tattooed to his bald head. Who is the mastermind who decided to mark his team of assassins in such an obviously telling way? He might as well put a big "L" on their foreheads.
Alien gives it 1 ½ “gamers delight” stars out of 4.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Enchanted
What happens when the fairy tale world collides with the real world? Animated characters fall through a magic portal, only to find themselves as flesh and blood in New York City. It is a hilarious romp as fairy tale mentalities try to cope with modern day New Yorkers and the Big Apple. Amy Adams absolutely steals the show with her perfect performance as the Princess-to-be Giselle. She carries the movie and really makes it work. Patrick Dempsey plays the single father who helps Giselle adjust to her strange new world. A chipmunk, the Prince (James Marsden), the evil Queen (Susan Sarandon) , and her henchman soon arrive in NYC. Only Disney can spoof Disney fairy tales so well. Will the Princess choose Prince Charming or McDreamy? How many memories from other Disney classics can you spot in this fairy tale with a twist? This is great fun for the kids, but even more fun for the adults. This cute and clever film is just too funny.
Alien gives it 3 ½ “true love’s kiss” stars out of 4.
What happens when the fairy tale world collides with the real world? Animated characters fall through a magic portal, only to find themselves as flesh and blood in New York City. It is a hilarious romp as fairy tale mentalities try to cope with modern day New Yorkers and the Big Apple. Amy Adams absolutely steals the show with her perfect performance as the Princess-to-be Giselle. She carries the movie and really makes it work. Patrick Dempsey plays the single father who helps Giselle adjust to her strange new world. A chipmunk, the Prince (James Marsden), the evil Queen (Susan Sarandon) , and her henchman soon arrive in NYC. Only Disney can spoof Disney fairy tales so well. Will the Princess choose Prince Charming or McDreamy? How many memories from other Disney classics can you spot in this fairy tale with a twist? This is great fun for the kids, but even more fun for the adults. This cute and clever film is just too funny.
Alien gives it 3 ½ “true love’s kiss” stars out of 4.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
August Rush
It’s “Oliver Twist” meets “Without a Trace” meets “Fame” in this fairy tale story about finding lost love through a musical connection. A symphony cellist (Kerri Russell) and a rock guitarist (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) have one magical moment resulting in a future musical prodigy (Freddie Highmore), but due to unfortunate circumstances, they all become lost and must find each other again years later. Although the film is very cliché and full of perfect coincidences leading the stars on a collision course, it still has the storybook ending we all want. Each note, each lyric is perfectly placed into each scene to convey that emotional moment. City sounds are turned into musical magic. Highmore is a delight as he discovers and creates music. This is a guilty pleasure for Alien because it tugged on the just the right chords of my musical heartstrings. Don’t worry about the details. Just follow the music and you may have a good time.
Alien gives it 3 “Washington Square” stars out of 4.
It’s “Oliver Twist” meets “Without a Trace” meets “Fame” in this fairy tale story about finding lost love through a musical connection. A symphony cellist (Kerri Russell) and a rock guitarist (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) have one magical moment resulting in a future musical prodigy (Freddie Highmore), but due to unfortunate circumstances, they all become lost and must find each other again years later. Although the film is very cliché and full of perfect coincidences leading the stars on a collision course, it still has the storybook ending we all want. Each note, each lyric is perfectly placed into each scene to convey that emotional moment. City sounds are turned into musical magic. Highmore is a delight as he discovers and creates music. This is a guilty pleasure for Alien because it tugged on the just the right chords of my musical heartstrings. Don’t worry about the details. Just follow the music and you may have a good time.
Alien gives it 3 “Washington Square” stars out of 4.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Beowulf
It’s the “300” on the CGI “Polar Express” as director Robert Zemeckis pumps life and drama into that classic old English epic poem about a legendary warrior who battles monsters and saves the Danish village. The film is a visual treat that will mesmerize your eyes from start to finish. It is hard to believe nothing is real in front of your face and that it is all computer drawn. It has the feel of a real movie except the characters look a little odd. The 3D effects add a lot of extra fun to the movie as it panders to the gimmick’s power. The script is wonderful and captures the spirit of a hero’s epic story. It has a monster, a fire-breathing dragon, brave warriors, damsels in distress, a curse, blood and gore; so what more could you ask for. This exhilarating CGI thrill ride may be rated PG-13, but parents beware, this is no Saturday morning cartoon. It is more of an adult animation with lots of action and violence, some male nudity modestly preserved through strategic object placements, racy female forms, head chomping, torso tearing, and appendage separation. Alien thought it was awesome on the regular theater screen, but some Dramamine may be suggested for those viewers opting for the IMAX experience.
Alien gives it 3 ½ “curse of the golden dragon cup” stars out of 4.
It’s the “300” on the CGI “Polar Express” as director Robert Zemeckis pumps life and drama into that classic old English epic poem about a legendary warrior who battles monsters and saves the Danish village. The film is a visual treat that will mesmerize your eyes from start to finish. It is hard to believe nothing is real in front of your face and that it is all computer drawn. It has the feel of a real movie except the characters look a little odd. The 3D effects add a lot of extra fun to the movie as it panders to the gimmick’s power. The script is wonderful and captures the spirit of a hero’s epic story. It has a monster, a fire-breathing dragon, brave warriors, damsels in distress, a curse, blood and gore; so what more could you ask for. This exhilarating CGI thrill ride may be rated PG-13, but parents beware, this is no Saturday morning cartoon. It is more of an adult animation with lots of action and violence, some male nudity modestly preserved through strategic object placements, racy female forms, head chomping, torso tearing, and appendage separation. Alien thought it was awesome on the regular theater screen, but some Dramamine may be suggested for those viewers opting for the IMAX experience.
Alien gives it 3 ½ “curse of the golden dragon cup” stars out of 4.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium
It’s “Willy Wonka” meets FAO Schwarz meets “Toy Story” in a wholesome family fantasy film about a toy store, but it’s not just an ordinary toy store; it’s magical. The store owner (Dustin Hoffman) plans to leave the business to his store manager (Natalie Portman) who isn’t sure she wants it. An accountant (Jason Bateman) and a cute kid (Zach Mills) try to help her decide. These actors have a good chemistry together being silly and playing off of each other. All kids, young and old, will love this movie filled with imagination and fun. It is a feel good movie whose message is to believe in yourself. It is a charming simple story that will have kids wanting to visit that Wonder Emporium.
Alien gives it 3 “kid-licious” stars out of 4.
It’s “Willy Wonka” meets FAO Schwarz meets “Toy Story” in a wholesome family fantasy film about a toy store, but it’s not just an ordinary toy store; it’s magical. The store owner (Dustin Hoffman) plans to leave the business to his store manager (Natalie Portman) who isn’t sure she wants it. An accountant (Jason Bateman) and a cute kid (Zach Mills) try to help her decide. These actors have a good chemistry together being silly and playing off of each other. All kids, young and old, will love this movie filled with imagination and fun. It is a feel good movie whose message is to believe in yourself. It is a charming simple story that will have kids wanting to visit that Wonder Emporium.
Alien gives it 3 “kid-licious” stars out of 4.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Southland Tales
This apocalyptic dramatic sci-fi comedy opens with a bang, an atomic one. It is a confusing story set in the near future, 2008. The lives of an amnesic action star (Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson), a porn star-turned-reality TV personality (Sarah Michelle Gellar), and a Hermosa Beach cop (Seann William Scott) with a twin become entangled in a visually stimulating, but perplexing plot which ridicules just about everything happening in today’s world. The movie tries to create a “Dr. Strangelove” meets “1984” kind of experience, but it comes off as just strange. Some of the satire revolves around these terms: Fluid Karma, Urban Pacification Units, Global Deceleration, Rift in the Space/Time Continuum, MegaZeppelin, Pimps Don’t Commit Suicide, US-Ident, and Neo-Marxist Revolution. Look for many familiar faces in this bold attempt that doesn’t really work. Many walked out in the middle of this screening. If you managed to hang on until the end, you will have wasted 2 ½ hours of your time that you won’t get back... unless you are a character in this film.
Alien gives it 1 ½ “doomsday” stars out of 4.
Alien’s suggested alternative movie title:
Doctored Strange Film: or How I Learned to Stop Whining and Hate This Bomb
This apocalyptic dramatic sci-fi comedy opens with a bang, an atomic one. It is a confusing story set in the near future, 2008. The lives of an amnesic action star (Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson), a porn star-turned-reality TV personality (Sarah Michelle Gellar), and a Hermosa Beach cop (Seann William Scott) with a twin become entangled in a visually stimulating, but perplexing plot which ridicules just about everything happening in today’s world. The movie tries to create a “Dr. Strangelove” meets “1984” kind of experience, but it comes off as just strange. Some of the satire revolves around these terms: Fluid Karma, Urban Pacification Units, Global Deceleration, Rift in the Space/Time Continuum, MegaZeppelin, Pimps Don’t Commit Suicide, US-Ident, and Neo-Marxist Revolution. Look for many familiar faces in this bold attempt that doesn’t really work. Many walked out in the middle of this screening. If you managed to hang on until the end, you will have wasted 2 ½ hours of your time that you won’t get back... unless you are a character in this film.
Alien gives it 1 ½ “doomsday” stars out of 4.
Alien’s suggested alternative movie title:
Doctored Strange Film: or How I Learned to Stop Whining and Hate This Bomb
Monday, November 12, 2007
Love in the Time of Cholera
Follow the 50 plus years love story of Florentino and Fremina in this beautiful, romantic tale of love’s passion and obsession. Experience the emotions of love’s highs and lows through these characters. The film takes us on a wondrous journey back to Colombia in the late 1800s. The details are a feast for the eyes. Status, time, and distance create unrequited love and heartache for Florentino and send him on a seductive path to ease his pain. This film, rated “R”, is a charming romance novel with some surprisingly sexy and humorous scenes. Go see it with your loved one. You’ll laugh and cry.
Alien gives it 3 “love letters” stars out of 4.
Follow the 50 plus years love story of Florentino and Fremina in this beautiful, romantic tale of love’s passion and obsession. Experience the emotions of love’s highs and lows through these characters. The film takes us on a wondrous journey back to Colombia in the late 1800s. The details are a feast for the eyes. Status, time, and distance create unrequited love and heartache for Florentino and send him on a seductive path to ease his pain. This film, rated “R”, is a charming romance novel with some surprisingly sexy and humorous scenes. Go see it with your loved one. You’ll laugh and cry.
Alien gives it 3 “love letters” stars out of 4.
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
P2
Just in time for the holidays and it is not a sequel to P1. It’s “Die Hard” meets “Black Snake Moan” meets “Saw” meets “Vacancy” meets “Dark Water” meets “Cujo” meets “Death Proof” for those terror thrill seekers and the twisted minded. P2 is that elevator button for parking level two where an attractive woman is trapped with a psychotic killer on Christmas Eve. Need I say more? The premise is fairly run of the mill, but this film just a cut above for the genre. You’ll get some scares, some gore, and a little black humor. You’ll root for the heroine when the hunted becomes the hunter. It’s good sick creepy fun.
Alien gives it 2 ½ “subterranean torture” stars of 4.
Just in time for the holidays and it is not a sequel to P1. It’s “Die Hard” meets “Black Snake Moan” meets “Saw” meets “Vacancy” meets “Dark Water” meets “Cujo” meets “Death Proof” for those terror thrill seekers and the twisted minded. P2 is that elevator button for parking level two where an attractive woman is trapped with a psychotic killer on Christmas Eve. Need I say more? The premise is fairly run of the mill, but this film just a cut above for the genre. You’ll get some scares, some gore, and a little black humor. You’ll root for the heroine when the hunted becomes the hunter. It’s good sick creepy fun.
Alien gives it 2 ½ “subterranean torture” stars of 4.
Thursday, November 01, 2007
American Gangster
It’s “We Own the Night” meets the “Godfather” when a Harlem crime boss and an honest New Jersey cop get headed on a collision course. The lives of Frank Lucas (Denzel Washington) and Richie Roberts (Russell Crowe) are contrasted in this story about organized crime, special police task forces, drug trafficking, and police corruption. Both are excellent their roles along with a great cast of supporting characters. This is a lengthy film (160 minutes), but it doesn’t seem so long because the story unravels in layers and keeps us hungry for more. Frank Lucas is fascinating and scary because he is so charming, smart, and ruthless. Since it is based on a real person no one seems to have heard of, Alien expects a lot of Googling on “Frank Lucas”. Alien won’t spoil movie for you by telling you any more. You must see it for yourself. Be sure to stay through the end of the credits for one last parting shot.
Alien gives it 3 “blue magic” stars out of 4.
It’s “We Own the Night” meets the “Godfather” when a Harlem crime boss and an honest New Jersey cop get headed on a collision course. The lives of Frank Lucas (Denzel Washington) and Richie Roberts (Russell Crowe) are contrasted in this story about organized crime, special police task forces, drug trafficking, and police corruption. Both are excellent their roles along with a great cast of supporting characters. This is a lengthy film (160 minutes), but it doesn’t seem so long because the story unravels in layers and keeps us hungry for more. Frank Lucas is fascinating and scary because he is so charming, smart, and ruthless. Since it is based on a real person no one seems to have heard of, Alien expects a lot of Googling on “Frank Lucas”. Alien won’t spoil movie for you by telling you any more. You must see it for yourself. Be sure to stay through the end of the credits for one last parting shot.
Alien gives it 3 “blue magic” stars out of 4.
