Alien at the Movies

Black as Night

It’s “Once Bitten” meets “Shawna the Vampire Slayer” meets “Shawna of the Undead” meets “Daybreakers” when a 15-year-old New Orleans black girl Shawna is attacked by homeless vampires & loses her drug addict mother. This comedy horror film pokes fun of its vampire genre while featuring diversity & a Black experience twist. It’s also a coming of age story as shy Shawna gains her confidence, pals around with her gay Mexican immigrant bestie Pedro, & develops a relationship with her crush. The film is entertaining, but not really scary as it paints its version of vampire myths or truths with a political homelessness backdrop.

Alien gives it 2½ “Red Escalade” stars out of 4.

Mayday

Reminiscent of the “Wizard of Oz”, an abused hotel worker Ana (Grace Van Patten) gets a jolt while trying to restore power during a storm. Dazed & confused, Ana crawls through a oven door portal that transports her into a surreal WWII setting with women stationed in a beached U-boat fighting an odd battle of the sexes. When the ladies aren’t frolicking in the ocean, they’re luring soldiers to their deaths with fake distress signals like Circe & her sirens. Now trained to be a sniper, Ana starts to doubt her killer instincts. Another strange dreamlike journey like Dorothy & rabbit hole/looking glass Alice before her.

Alien gives it 2 “ Mary Alpha Yankee Delta Alpha Yankee” stars out of 4.

Through the Glass Darkly

In small the small town of Elrod, Georgia, a mother Charlie (Robyn Lively) is sure that the latest missing child case is link to her missing child Lily. Having lost faith in the local sheriff department, Charlie & a reporter investigate on their own in a town controlled by the wealthy Carmichael family. Addicted to alcohol & pills, Charlie is labeled as the town’s crazy lady who seems to be hallucinating seeing her precious Lily. Follow her journey as she searches for the truth. Typical missing person mystery but with a slight twist.

Alien gives it 2½ “time is relative” stars out of 4.

The Voyeurs

A young couple Pippa & Thomas (Sydney Sweeney & Justice Smith) sign an apartment lease & move in together. When they become distracted by photoshoot flashes from the apartment directly across the street, they become seduced & obsessed by the neighbors’ sexual activities. It’s shades of “Rear Window” as the question about the morality of invading another’s private life is posed. How far is too far before you cross that line? Ironically, we, the audience, become voyeurs ourselves watching these couples on screen. This is a sexual thriller that may catch you off guard as you watch to see if curiosity will kill the cat. Rated R for sexual content & nudity.

Alien gives it 3 “eye doctor” stars out of 4.

Antidote 

A young woman Sharyn goes into a hospital for a ruptured appendix & apparently wakes up in an experimental laboratory where patients are maimed only to be miraculously heal with some secret serum (I️ think the title “Antidote” is a bit inaccurate). This is a weird horror flick where these patients seem to be trapped in a living hell or is this some evil government plot or is Sharyn having some strange hallucinations. The doctor & other patients are creepy. And what do the flashbacks have to do with the storyline? It’s a puzzle trying to figure out where this one is leading to.

Alien gives it 2 “B.M.S” stars out of 4.

Army of the Dead

It’s “The Expendables” meets “Dawn of the Dead” meets “Oceans 11” meets “Escape from New York” when mercenary Scott Ward (Dave Bautista) puts together a team to recover $200 million from a casino vault in Las Vegas, a city sealed off due an out-of-control zombie infection outbreak. Expect lots of blood & guts to be spilled as this rag tag team must fight their way in & out before an atomic warhead nukes Vegas. Inside, there is a dangerous intelligent group of Alpha zombies lead by the Queen & Zeus. It’s a long 2.5 hour journey to the end to see who will survive.

Alien gives it 3 “zombie tigers & horses, oh my” stars out of 4.

Cry Macho

At 91, Clint Eastwood is back in the saddle again. Eastwood directs & stars as Mike, a former rodeo star & has-been horse breeder, hired to bring back his ex-boss’ 13-year-old son from Mexico. The boy, Rafo, is a troubled street kid caught in an abusive situation. With the feel of “Grand Torino”, it the story of a grouchy old man, a delinquent kid, & a rooster on a bumpy road trip with lessons to be learned. Eastwood is terrific giving an accurate performance of a weary old cowboy ready mosey on into the sunset. Rafo seems a little too gringo for the part, but he is key to translating a lot of the Mexican dialogue. The rooster, Macho, is well trained & always hits his mark. This relationship bonding film may be too slow paced & dry for some people.

Alien gives it 2½ “wild horses” stars out of 4.

 Escape Plan: The Extractors

This is a direct-to-video sequel of the 2013 Escape Plan. Security expert Ray Breslin (Sylvester Stallone) & company are back in revenge story about rescuing kidnapped victims. It’s a predictable plot with stereotypical character types. Stallone is the obvious hero. Asian woman is the damsel in distress. Two Asian men are onboard for their martial arts fighting skills. Dave Bautista in the big tough silent guy with explosive firepower filling in for the Schwarzenegger type. Then there is the bland bad guy & his henchmen. This can be a fun watch if you like this genre for the action but some things just don’t make sense. Why does this old abandoned Russian prison have these huge sewer tunnels under it that you can drive a car through? I️ never saw the second edition to this trilogy? Hidden in the middle of the credits is a reveal about one of the characters.

Alien gives it 2 “Devil’s Station” stars out of 4.

Luca

Pixar’s latest animated feature is about 2 sea monster boys whose dreams of riding a Vespa lures them the surface & mingle with the local Italian villagers. Apparently, these sea monsters appear as regular humans if they aren’t wet. So Luca & Antonio, as disguised regular boys, join a village girl in a triathlon team for an annual big race. This is another heartwarming story with fantastic animation. So go after your dreams & just be yourself. This one feels more direct towards the kiddies.

Alien gives it 2½ “gelato, pasta, & scooter rides” stars out of 4.

Dark Blood

After being imprisoned for a brutal revenge crime, Misael (John Leguizamo) suffers from terrible abuse from the guards as well as from the other prisoners. The living conditions in what appears to be a Mexican prison are horrible. The dialogue spoken is in Spanish with English subtitles. As the days pass, Misael’s situation goes from bad to worse. He seems to only have 2 allies in there, an old man & a dog. All he wants is to see his son & explain what had happened. Leguizamo is excellent as the tortured & desperate man. However, abuse & living conditions may be hard to watch. At the very end, there is a surprising twist that caught me off guard.

Alien gives 2½ “one minute phone calls” stars out of 4.

Malignant

In 1993, a patient referred to as Gabriel kills several staff members at a research hospital & must be sedated. Jump forward 28 years, an abusive husband Derek & his pregnant wife Madison (Annabelle Wallis) appear to be attacked, leaving him dead & her in the hospital. What is the connection between these 2 events? As more grizzly homicides occur, Madison starts to have visions of these killings. Two cops are trying connect these murders. Madison’s sister Sidney (Maddie Hasson) tries to help. The slow beginning is used to build suspense while unraveling the clues a little at a time. When the bizarre crux to the plot is revealed, the crazy action ramps up to an unbelievable level. This one is different. You’ll probably either love it (you were scared) or hated it (thought it was stupid) with no in between.

Alien gives it 2 “sibling” stars out of 4.

Gunpowder Milkshake

At the age of 12, Sam (Karen Gillan) was abandoned by her assassin mother Scarlet (Lena Headey). She was then raised & trained to also be an assassin by Nathan (Paul Giamatti) of the Firm. When a job goes wrong, Sam tries to protect a little girl named Emily & has to go rogue with an army of henchmen trying to kill her. This one feels like “John Wick” meets “Kill Bill” with a neon tint but it’s more of a comedy parody to that genre. Look for humorous nods to parenting, Universal’s movie monsters & Tina Turner in this girl power firepower blast. Michelle Yeoh, Carla Gugino, & Angela Bassett are the aunty librarians of the arsenal depository where you can’t judge a book by its cover. This mother/daughter relationship film is just popcorn fun & is not to be taken seriously. 

Alien gives is 2½ “ 8¾ apprentice” stars out of 4.

The Tunnel

It’s “Daylight” in Norway at Christmas time when a tanker accident in a long tunnel leads to a fire, a explosion, & panic as people become trapped by smoke & ash unable to see & breathe. Weather, an avalanche, & time are working against the rescuers & the victims. It’s the classic big time disaster setup that will tug at emotional core. This foreign film was dubbed in English for my viewing pleasure. A widowed snowplow driver is the hero here. He has a teenage daughter who, of course, happens to be onboard a bus on route thru this tunnel.

Alien gives it 2½ “Call Center” stars out of 4.

Monsters of Man

It’s “I️ , Robot” meets “Robocop” meets “Terminator”when a government contractor & a CIA official send 4 new prototype AI robots on a secret unauthorized test mission pitting their machines against a gang of illegal drug runners in Southeast Asia. Caught in the middle are the innocent local villagers & 6 lost in the jungle med students as well as 3 support techies duped into their true mission. Of course, there is always that fly in the ointment, the ex-Navy SEAL hiding from his past & doing volunteer work for the locals. Things start to go wrong so witnesses must be eliminated. Except for the usual collateral damage deaths, these smart bots seem to have the targeting accuracy of Stormtroopers & a seemingly endless amount of bullets. This cat & mouse game is a fun & entertaining thrill watch. It comes down to mano a mano & rock ‘em sock ‘em robots. Stay to the end to see if the fat lady sings.

Alien gives it 3 “what is life” stars out of 4.

Annette

Standup comedian Henry (Adam Driver) falls for opera singer Ann (Marion Colliard). Simon Helberg plays their conductor friend. All is good until they have a baby Annette & then the story turns very dark. Did I️ mention this was a musical? Brothers Ron & Russell Mael of Sparks originally composed this music for their album but ended writing this screenplay. The film feels rather artistic & avant-garde with how it is beautifully shot. If you hate musicals, you’ll probably won’t like film. If your tastes lean more toward the weird, you might enjoy it. When baby Annette is first introduced, she is symbolically portrayed by a marionette. Yes, odd. However, there a great duet near the end where 5-year-old Devyn McDowell replaces the puppet form. It’s a basic plot about a troubled marriage, substance abuse, & some bad behavior set to song.

Alien gets it 1½  “haunting songs” stars out of 4.

News of the World

Experience Texas’ Wild West in 1870 through the eyes of retired Captain Jeffry Kyle Kidd (Tom Hanks). These were times before radio, tv, & the internet so Kidd would ride from town to town reading various newspapers articles to the locals. When he finds a young girl who had been kidnapped & raised by Indians, he feel obligated to return her to her kin. The road trip to home is a dangerous one, but it’s also a bonding experience.

Alien gives it 3 “birdshot” stars out of 4.

Cinderella 

It’s the old legendary tale of the poor stepdaughter with the glass slipper & the fairy godmother but with a bold contemporary twist. This musical remake features singer/songwriter Camilla Cabello in title role, I️dina Menzel as the stepmother, Nicholas Galitzine as Prince Robert, Billy Porter as Fab Godmother, Pierce Brosnan as King Rowan, Minnie Driver as Queen Beatrice, & James Corden as one of the 3 mice/footmen. However, this version marches to a rap/pop song beat while focusing on a young woman’s fashion dream of starting her own business in a sexist misogynistic world. The film attempts to appeal to today’s younger audience but it’s no Disney nor “Enchanted”. The film smartly pokes fun of Brosnan’s “Mama Mia” singing skills. The moral of the fairy tale is to follow your dreams.

Alien gives it 2 “blue business suit” stars out of 4.