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Thursday, August 25, 2011

Colombiana

A young girl suffers from "Dark Knight" syndrome when her parents are murdered by a Colombian drug lord. Thus she gives up her dreams of becoming Xena, Warrior Princess, and decides to become a killer. It is a very thin and obvious plot of vengeance strung together by a series of slick action scenes. If you have seen "The Professional", "Transporter", and "Taken" you may recognize Luc Besson's handy work, but this weak script reeks more of "Transporter 2" with many Mission: Implausible situations. However, who cares if Zoe Saldana is prancing around scantily clad and with machine guns blazing. One sequence of her slinking around in a tight lycra outfit has Alien questioning the choice of Anne Hatheway as Catwoman in the next Batman movie. Too bad, Saldana can only stay two steps ahead of the police, the FBI, the CIA, and the Cartel because Besson wrote it that way. You'll probably enjoy this one more if you don't take it seriously and chuckle at the ridiculous moments like the bathroom brawl featuring a towel and toothbrushes as weapons.

Alien gives it 2 "coincidental orchid" stars out of 4.

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