Alien at the Movies

In Her Shoes

This movie is about two sisters (Cameron Diaz and Toni Collette) who love each other dearly, but get on each other’s nerves. One is responsible and the other is flighty. Both make drastic changes in their lives and begin to reconnect with their family. Shirley MacLaine plays the grandmother. Alien feels he doesn’t have enough estrogen coursing through his veins to fully appreciate this chick flick.

Alien gives it 2 ½ “Jimmy Choo” stars out of 4, but suspects the predominately female movie goers attracted to this film would give it 3 ½ stars.

Into the Blue

Anyone remember “The Deep” (1977) with Jacqueline Bisset in a wet t-shirt and Nick Nolte? Well, here comes the same basic story with Jessica Alba in a bikini and Paul Walker. It’s “Open Water” meets “Jaws” meets “Pirates of the Caribbean” with a splash of “Thunderball”. Four young and buff treasure seekers find traces of a shipwreck and a lost cargo of drugs. Of course, the bad guys want their drugs back. Although fairly predictable, it is still a fun thrill ride. The underwater scenes are quite spectacular.

Alien gives it 3 “Hawaiian sling“ stars out of 4.

A History of Violence

This film asks the questions: can a man put his past behind him and how far can a non-violent person be pushed before they explode? Is Tom Stall (Viggo Mortensen) a peaceful family man from a small town or a violent killer from Philly named Joey Cusack? A heroic event puts Tom and his family in a life altering situation. This film is rated “R” for language, graphic sexuality, and extremely violent images. Mortensen skillfully plays the Tom/Joey role, but the film left Alien feeling disturbed and unsatisfied at the end. The film is about violence, but it is against violence by exposing its brutality.

Alien gives it 2 “dual personalities” stars out of 4.

The Greatest Game Ever Played

It’s tee time when “The Rookie” meets “Cinderella Man” on the links. Once again Disney has worked its imagineering magic to tell the inspirational and heartwarming story about a young amateur golfer, Francis Ouimet, from a working class family trying to compete in a gentlemen’s game for the rich and upper class. It is based on a true story that climaxes at the 1913 U.S. Open pitting professionals and amateurs against each other to prove who is the best golfer in the world. The entire cast all give good solid performances, but Francis’ 10-year old caddie practically steals the show. The special effects are clever and spectacular. The movie builds amazing drama, tension, and excitement just in following a little white dimpled ball flying through the air and rolling along the grass. Alien highly recommends this family film.

Alien gives it 4 “never give up on your dream” stars out of 4.

Waiting

Have you ever wondered about what happens to your restaurant meal before it is served at your table? Or what really happens when you send a meal back to the chef to correct? Your worst fears and more are portrayed in this so-called comedy about inappropriate behavior in the kitchen. But if you love sophomoric frat boy humor, this film might be for you. The most clever thought in the movie was represented by the operation of the Rube Goldberg type contraption at the very end of the credits. Movie goers, just move on and don’t wait in line for this one.

Alien gives it 1 “five second rule” stars out of 4.

Magnificent Desolation: Walking on the Moon 3D

This IMAX movie takes you to the surface of the moon where only 12 astronauts have been. See and hear their lunar experiences. The 3D re-creations are spectacular, but Alien was hoping for actual lunar footage to be converted to 3D IMAX format. The overuse of 2D images displayed as floating tiles grew very tiresome after awhile.

Alien gives it 2 “lunar eclipsed” stars out of 4.

Corpse Bride

Director Tim Burton is the master of the dark and quirky. Once again, he has skillfully created another fascinating new world for his odd characters and the audience to briefly wander within. Burton manages to twist humor and morbidity together in an interesting way for this strange tale of a love triangle between the living and the dead. Can they all live happily ever after?

Alien gives it 3 ½ “frightful and delightful” stars out of 4.

Flightplan

Alien missed his trip to “Flightplan” when his screening was overbooked and he had to be at another airport anyway at that time.

But here is another junior critic-in-training's review:

So you’re the designer of an engine for a world class jet and you have intimate knowledge of the plane’s layout. Your daughter is missing aboard this massive plane full of avionics and the crew’s passengers tell you that your daughter is a figment of your imagination. Her name is not on the manifest, there is a death certificate for her that’s been faxed in and no one on board remember seeing you with her. So are you crazy or is the plot crazy? Or both? Buckle your seatbelt and prepare yourself for some wild chases and at the same time a tour of modern aviation and finally a crash landing! You may not want to board this flight unless you like economy class.

I found "Flightplan" OK until the end. I would give it 2 stars.

Roll Bounce

It’s “Saturday Night Fever” on wheels meets “That 70’s Show” when the local roller rink closes up for good and the kids must travel to the “other” side of town to carry on their passion for roller skating. Watching these adolescents takes you down memory lane to a more innocent time when disco was king. Of course the movie climaxes with the big group skate competition. But whether it’s win, lose, or draw, it’s still a great skate film. Sweet is a good one-word description for a movie set at a rink named “Sweetwater” which features a skate idol nicknamed “Sweetness”. Alien thought “Roll Bounce” was a bit corny, but fun to watch and relive the past again.

Alien gives it 2 ½ “skate key” stars out of 4.

Cry_Wolf

This movie is a modern update of the classic tale of the boy who cried wolf. Except in this version, a group of teenage prep school students get caught in a game of deceit and lies. Their emailed fictional predictions appear to come true and they must run for their lives. It’s a game within a game. What seems like the typical teenage slasher movie is really a murder mystery. Can you unravel the puzzle and identify the killer?

Alien gives it 2 ½ “liar, liar, pants on fire” stars out of 4.

Lord of War

Follow the exploits of Yuri Orlov (Nicolas Cage), international arms dealer, who is a shrewd businessman selling weapons to many of the world’s most notorious dictators and evading the pursuit of the relentless Interpol agent (Ethan Hawke). Instead of being the traditional action flick, “Lord of War” turns out to be an antiwar film using true historical facts to emphasize it points. This drama with a hint of trying to be a dark comedy is rated “R” for strong violence, drug use, language, and sexual content. The film artistically opens by following the journey of a single bullet from its manufacture to its distribution to its final resting place in the body of its intended target. Alien also enjoyed the cash register “ka-chings” blended into sound of rapid machine gun fire.

Alien gives it 2 ½ “Farewell to Arms” stars out of 4.

An Unfinished Life

This is not a sneak preview. This film has already released.

Welcome to Ishawooa, where the Sundance Kid/Horse Whisperer (Robert Redford) turns into a grumpy old man who has a wise old sidekick (Morgan Freeman) ala “Million Dollar Baby”. Their lives are disrupted when Redford’s daughter-in-law (Jennifer Lopez without the accent) and his granddaughter (Becca Gardner) arrive at his ranch unexpectedly. Not only is this movie is about abuse, blame, and a bear, but it is also about family, forgiveness, and facing your fears. The film is filled with great performances all around with the beautiful Wyoming countryside as its backdrop.

Alien gives it 3 “Tombstone Epitaph” stars out of 4.

Just Like Heaven

Do you believe in fate and fairy tales? If you do, then you may enjoy this romantic comedy about two lost souls, Reese Witherspoon and Mark Ruffalo, trying to help each other. It’s “Grey’s Anatomy” meets “Ghost” meets the “Sixth Sense” meets “All of Me” meets “Sleeping Beauty” in the “Streets of San Francisco” with a touch of the “Exorcist” and “Ghostbusters” costarring “Napoleon Dynamite” all grown up. Ruffalo shares an apartment with Witherspoon’s spirit. This is definitely a chick flick/great date movie, but it is also charming and very funny. Though it’s predictable in some places, it still has a few surprises. Alien was entertained.

Alien gives it 3 “Garden of Eden” stars out of 4.

The Man

Who da man? In the spirit of “Lethal Weapon” and “Rush Hour” comes the buddy/cop team of Samuel L. Jackson (“The Man”, undercover ATF agent) and Eugene Levy (so not “The Man", dental supply salesman). In a case of mistaken identity, Levy gets entangled in a stolen arms deal and eventually becomes “The Man” in this very funny film. Levy’s innocent Joe Average portrayal perfectly counters Jackson’s tough street-wise characterization in a cleverly written script. It’s a fun movie to close out the summer and head back to school. It is rated PG-13 for violence, language, and rude noises.

Alien gives it 3 “Odd Couple” stars out of 4.

The Exorcism of Emily Rose

Alien suspects the trailer for this legal trial movie misleads the viewers into believing this film is a horror tale like “The Exorcist”. A team of junior critics-in-training has been dispatched to preview the film and prove Alien right or wrong.

The report indicates that Alien was on the right track. My junior critic enjoyed the plotline, the performances of the lawyers, and the interweaving of flashbacks to explain the story. He also liked it because it was based on a true story.

My J-C-I-T gives it 3 ½ "demonic possession" stars out of 4.

Alien finally got around the check this one out.

This is two films for the price of one. It is a scary horror film and a dramatic murder trial movie carefully blended together. Do you believe it demonic possession and exorcism? Alien felt unsettled at the end of the film.

Alien gives it 3 “guilty or innocent verdict” stars out of 4.

The Sound of Thunder

…is what you hear when an allosaurus rumbles toward you.

It’s “Jurassic Park” meets “Back to the Future” meets “Planet of the Apes” with a splash of “The Poseidon Adventure”. Ray Bradbury’s classic short story about a time safari gone terribly wrong has been expanded to reveal how a small change in the past can cause ripples in time with disastrous effects. Alien liked the basic plotline. The acting was fair, but the special effects must have been caught in a time warp stuck in the 1960’s. This sci-fi drama is almost comical at times, but there is nothing that Steven Spielberg, Tom Cruise, and a “War of the World” size special effects budget couldn’t fix.

Alien gives it 2 “butterfly effect” stars out of 4.

Transporter 2

The man with the rules, Frank Martin, is back with his imitation of "Man on Fire". Frank's new job is being a chauffeur for a small child. After an incident occurs and they try to blame Frank, that's when the fun begins. Expect more of the same entertaining stunts as in the original movie.
Once again, Alien had to send a junior critic-in-training to cover this preview and here is their report:

The movie was great fun. It had more humor in it and a darling little boy. Most of his rules were for the little boy he was in charge of, like: Never make a promise you "can't" keep. He had several rules for the little boy for riding in his car like: Respect another man's car. Wear your seatbelt. etc....

The movie had some good action/fight scenes. A couple were WAY beyond realistic (more fantasy) than anything. They were fun though, just the concept. HAD SOME GREAT CARS!!! There were a couple things left hanging and not explained which was a little disappointing.

The villains were very "hateable", especially since they were victimizing a little boy in order to bring down the drug control officials.

The (French) cop from the first movie was in this one. It took place in Miami and he came for a visit, which turned out not to be much of a visit since he spent all of it at the police station.

It was very entertaining, funny and nice when the villian loses and the hero wins.
There could very well be a Sequel 3 the way it ended. I enjoyed this movie and would pay to see it but I think I still liked the first one a little better. Maybe there was a bit more realism in the first one and I REALLY loved the oil/fight scene in that one.

J-C-I-T gives it 3 stars out of 4.

Here is Alien’s review of “Transporter 2” after catching only the last 25 minutes.

Prepare to suspend all thoughts of realism and just sit back to view the highly stylized fighting and stunt scenes surrounding a plot involve kidnapping and the release of a biological pathogen in Miami.

Alien didn’t see enough to give out any stars, but Alien liked the original better.